Who doesn’t love lists? You get minimal time investment in reading them and little pearls of wisdom may get dropped on your forehead.
Plus, it’s not one of those long drawn out articles that at times can get bogged down with training principles and theories.
If you love lists and the gym, then I’ve got a little something for you.
While working at a health club smack bang in the middle of Downtown Dallas, I’ve seen stuff that that will make you scratch your head, make your eyes burn and make you want your forehead to meet a brick wall, repeatedly.
Let’s start off with this picture to get everyone in the mood……………………..
Because deep down we all want to be this cool.
1. Enough with fitness shaming (Hello, Biggest Loser). Instead fitness should be celebrated like American Ninja Warrior.
2. Training involves more than posting to Facebook or Instagram. Pick up a weight or two before the bragging begins.
3. Don’t ever show your underarm fat to a coach and ask, “What do I do about these chicken wings?” Do I really need to say why?
4. Those dance moves belong in a club and not in front of the dumbbell rack while I’m waiting to get my curls on.
5. Laying the weight plates by the weight stack doesn’t count as putting them away. Get your lazy so and so back there and burn a few extra calories by re-racking the weights correctly. See, was that so hard?
6. I think Liam Neeson said it best…………….
7. If you’re grunting so loudly that everybody can hear you, you better not have 10 pound dumbbells in your hands.
8. Why do you carry around that gallon water jug? There’s a water tap just over there.
9. Knee bends are not squats and never will be. Get some weight off the bar and aim your butt at your heels for a change.
10. Put some clothes on, please. Other gym goers don’t need to see some else’s private parts. Somethings are better left for the imagination.
11. It’s okay to sweat, dude, but please, pretty please clean up after yourself. You’re not at home anymore.
12. Wearing sunglasses while working out is never cool. I don’t care what Corey Hart says.
13. If you’re getting dirty looks while on your cell phone, you’re talking too loudly. No one needs to hear your pet name for your partner.
14. Stop wearing that weight belt for submaximal lifts and use your core muscles for a change.
15. Did you know the bicep muscles weight around a pound? So stop wasting so much time doing 15 different variations while admiring them in the mirror and grunting.
16. Stop bragging. Somewhere in the gym universe, someone is warming up with you max.
17. Stop telling everybody within ear shot how may times you’ve been hurt (I’ve been guilty of this). Nobody cares and that person in the wheelchair really doesn’t give a crap.
18. Bacon goes with just about anything. Maybe even deadlifts.
19. Hogging a machine or piece of equipment is never cool. When someone asks, “Can I work in with you?” the answer should always be yes.
20. Exercise is never a punishment and is always a reward. I bet that guy in the wheelchair would love to walk again.
21. If you’re not doing some sort of squatting, deadlifting, single leg work, carrying, pressing or pulling in your gym training, you’re just spinning your wheels. The rest is just window dressing.
22. Playing Candy Crush on your phone while spotting your partner goes beyond stupid. Yes, this actually happened.
23. If you’re training just to look good, you’re missing the point.
24. If you’ve gotten this far, you’ve missed your anabolic window. Quick, go get some protein.
25. Farmer’s walks are the biggest bang for your buck exercise that hardly anybody does. Why? Cause they’re bloody hard.
26. Boot camps are for the army, not the gym. Everything else is group training.
27. Instead of telling everybody how it’s done, shut up and show them how it’s done (I’m guilty of this one, too).
28. Travis Pollen is amazing and there are many more like him in gyms everywhere. I have no excuses. Neither do you.
29. You cannot have enough strength in entire core (not just the abs), upper back and grip. Strengthening these three areas carries over to almost everything.
30. Why do people wake up at the arse crack of dawn just to run on a treadmill? One of life’s mind boggling mysteries.
31. Coffee makes early mornings bearable, barely.
32. When it comes to fitness, many different paths will take you to the same destination. Choose the fun path.
33. Never make eye contact with anyone while doing hip thrusts. They may get the wrong idea. Just saying.
The gym is a place where everybody can walk out bigger and stronger versions of themselves. Let’s keep it that way for everybody. Share, be considerate, smile, get after it and let’s all have some fun.
If you need any help with your training, please contact me here.